Week 6: Libido

Discussion Questions

1. What resources have you heard emphasize that women often have a high sex drive, as well? Or have high-libido wives not been discussed in your experience?
2. Sheila explains the “Pant, kiss, clothes, bed” mentality around libido we often see in movies and in novels. Is this how you have seen libido, too?
3. Joanna shared stats that showed that what matters for women’s pleasure during sex was not that they were aroused before they had sex, but rather that they reliably did get aroused! How can we help couples understand that the goal is not necessarily spontaneous libido, but rather that sex is something that is reliably pleasurable for both parties?
4. Have you heard the “72-hour-rule”? Where did you learn it from? Was it interesting to realize that it’s not based in research?
5. Our results from our survey drastically changed how we see sexless marriages. After learning that sexless marriages are often the result of long-term sexual mistreatment or neglect, has your view on sexless marriages changed?
6. What advice should we be giving couples struggling with mismatched libidos rather than simply the lose-lose situation of “one settles for less, the other puts up with more?”